There really is no secret to it: Sex sells.
As a fresh 18-year-old college freshman I went into my first sex shop wide-eyed and bushy tailed. Let me tell you, West LA knows what’s up with the adult emporiums, and I felt like such a badass waltzing in. I was greeted with an inviting chime of the double doors and meandered around the store with my friend (no I didn’t go alone, haha). There is some wild shit out there, and as we marveled aimlessly – we didn’t come in for any specific reason – we were approached by a sales associate that demanded us to show him our ID’s. I handed mine over and felt my face get beet red with embarrassment, feeling like a kid that was caught by her parents stealing from the cookie jar. My friend and I must have looked like prepubescent toddlers because he scrutinized us in disbelief for several minutes. Even got the ol’ “what is your zip code” question. Really, bro? [Fast forward ten years later] and now looking back I would accept this request as a kind compliment.
Feeling like I was fresh out juvenile hall he let us on our way, but not before giving us a 15 minute explanation on the different types of lube. Yup, lube chat.
So ends the reading on my first experience visiting a sex shop. Glad I got that one off my chest.
Yes that was a long winded anecdote, and I swear I have a point to get across. Sex shops can be intimidating, especially when you are young, wild, and free. Did you know you can avoid all human interaction and buy sex toys online? “Duh, everyone knows that”. Did you know that Etsy sells sex toys??
The artisan marketplace for handmade goods has amassed over one million shops from all over the world. Instead of bracing yourself for the awkward trip to your local sex shop or spending your valuable sexy time sifting through the different options around other websites, check out the hipster artisan Etsy sex shops I found.
- GeekySexyToys – Brisbane, Australia. Various offerings include the Incredible Dong (yes after the Incredible Hulk), Captain Anal, and the Bitcoin Ball Gag.
- BONBDSM – Bangkok, Thailand. (HAHAhaa cmon I know you laughed too). Specialty is handmade bondage gear for kinky lovers. Fetish gear, BDSM accessories and sex toys.
- Harness Queen – No Location listed. 100% handmade leather accessories. Check out their sexy leather harnesses, pencil skirts, and Halloween masks.
- Fantasticocks – Somewhere in the United States. Creativity and aesthetic appeal for these dildos is a 10/10. The mystical Theo the Pegasus, the Argus the Demon Dildo, and the Magnate the Robot Dildo are guaranteed to tickle your fantasies.
- Creative Kink – Royersford, Pennsylvania. The ‘Mother F’er’ Multi Cane (Etsy does not allow profanity FYI) and the ‘Evil Authority’ BSDM Spanking tools are their staples. They provoke the sensations: (and I quote): “this isn’t caning, this is loving. The kind of love you show in a karate school. With a kick. In the ass”. Durability 10/10.
Support your local entrepreneurs and search the millions of handmade items, here. I couldn’t find a specific category to narrow my search, so let me know on Twitter if you do! Etsy lives up to their mantra as the world’s most ‘imaginative marketplace’.
